Can the Changing of the Seasons Mess with Your Love Life?
It’s been quite windy this week and the temperatures have dropped dramatically where I live in Michigan. It’s my first time living in a place that’s not San Diego and the difference in temperature is making itself known. The wind blowing actually makes for a lot of mental chatter in Oriental Medicine. For me, it brings on an energy of urgent stress that I feel in my jaw and shoulders if I’m not balanced. In addition to the season’s changing, we have a lot of planetary activity happening.
I’m not usually affected by Venus being retrograde, where my Astrology friend said we can be prone to brat attacks if we don’t get our way. But it happened.
I had been feeling frustrated because I was low energy by the time my love came home from work which had me super grumpy. I saw a blue heron fly by outside our window as I was making dinner. In hindsight, I wish I would have looked up the the message of that bird as animals often show up when I need messages. I don’t usually take things out on my partner, but I did. I enjoy having a tidy home and had cleaned the house that day as the energy felt stagnant. When energy is stagnant around me I don’t feel joyful. In addition to working with clients, I swept the kitchen, did the laundry, vacuumed, and cleaned the bathrooms. There was also a dirty pot with grease in it that I really didn’t want to clean, but I did. While doing all of this, I could feel myself seething with anger at the fact that I had no help. Now, my boyfriend will always help with anything, but when I want something done now, it’s not always possible. So I was mad that I had to do this all myself. He didn’t expect me to do any of that. Later when I was saying why I was tired and stressed, he even said, “Baby. There’s no need to stress yourself out like that. We have everything we need. I’ll help wherever I can.” This man makes it very difficult to stay grumpy for long. Just that day, the message from Deepak Chopra’s meditation was, “I aim to reduce needless pressure in my life.” I took a breath and laughed.
What I realized is that I was actually mad at myself for putting the pressure on myself to do all of the cleaning in one day and not asking for help because it’s vulnerable. Being exhausted and lashing out at the end of the day doesn’t necessarily make for joyful romantic times with my partner. I’d been wanting that feeling of romance with him and it wasn’t happening because I was too far over the tired ledge.
I did apologize, but felt badly that I treated him that way. It’s not who I am, but it is who I can become when out of balance between work and play. I’d been wanting to take a bath all day and it never happened because of the shoulds I placed on myself. Am I happy the house is clean? Yes, and I could have spread out the tasks and waited until my partner got home to ask for help. It was a lesson for me not to pack too many accountabilities in one day. It makes for a tired and wired, grumpy lady.
After a good night’s sleep, I decided to take a bath FIRST thing in the morning. Well, Meow Meow wanted cuddle time first, which is a good way to calm my nerves anyway. To help with the dryness that the wind brings, I decided to add extra minerals of dissolved Arrowroot powder, magnesium salts, (soothes the muscles too) Mediterranean Sea salt cluster, (energy cleansing) and a drop of nourishing Vetiver.
The Goddess that showed up for the water ritual was Gwenevere, the goddess of love How perfect! My sweetheart does refer to me as his, hot, sexy, love Goddess.” She reminded me that when I nurture myself, which includes baths, she will bring in great romance because it starts with me.
Blue Heron message, from Dr.Steven Farmer’s Pocket Guide to Spirit Animals, “Take full responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and actions, rather than blaming others or life circumstances.”